Checklist 31

If the wife of Lemuel had been around in the 21st century, I believe he would still have had just as much trouble finding her. If you’re not sure what I mean, head over to Proverbs 31.

Women are just too busy to be busy. If you’re still not sure what I mean, consider rewriting the verses as an acrostic poem in a modern context and in English:

A women of noble character who can find?
Be careful what you say of her behind!
Call every day and comment on her hair,
Do little deeds that show her that you care…
Each morning she will put the washing on
Fetch milk in, make the beds and carry on –
Go out to buy the shopping in a hurry,
Have friends to lunch and make an instant curry,
In fact she is so multi-skilled,
Just think of all the jobs she could have filled! Her
Kitchen sink and floor are needing cleaning,
Lists everywhere (which makes it less demeaning) –
Moreover when the hoovering is done,
Notes written, phone calls made and washing spun,
(Oh what a shame – she would have liked a rest,)
Picks up the kids, and tries to look her best,
Quick, home, prepares a meal in ten minutes,
Responds to questions on the power of spinach, 
Sorts out the post (why is it always late?)
The dishwasher won’t take another plate.
Upstairs for stories, really needs a cuppa,
Votes online, offline, sponsors someone’s tuppa-
Ware thingy, and her mind is going hazy, e
Xtremely hard to think when life’s so crazy.
You’d think she ought to put it in a blog – in fact
Zhe zhould be zleeping like a log

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One response to “Checklist 31

  1. In light of the goings on in Oxford and the poet who thought she didn’t know it, I must add:
    If you can’t do the rhyme, don’t do the crime…

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